Do I Regret Quitting Instagram? 15 Months Later, the Truth About What Really Happened

I left Instagram at what felt like the peak of my creator career, and since then, so much has changed personally, professionally, and emotionally. In this post, I’m sharing the story of my rise, my fall, and the lessons I learned. If you’ve ever wondered what it’s really like to step away from social media, here’s the truth…raw, honest, and completely unfiltered.

---

A lot of my friends and followers couldn’t fathom why I’d left Instagram. I think what’s confusing for them is the fact that I left at “the top of my game.” I was well on the way to 100,000 followers. I got my first book deal from an Instagram relationship. I’d just become an Ebony Magazine docuseries host and a SkillShare Masterclass teacher. I was constantly getting speaking engagements, and I had seven full-time team members, three of whom I was able to pay six-figure incomes, which is still insane to 22-year-old me who wondered if I would ever not be broke.

I don’t list all of this to be braggadocio¹. I guess I’m still trying to make sense of it? What was the moment that made me leave? And was leaving all of this behind worth it?

I got an advice column submission from Angel, a subscriber who didn’t know me from my social media days, which was both refreshing and terrifying to realize that “new” folks were now reading my words.

Angel said:

“Your Substack inspires me to keep going in entrepreneurship and now that means starting an Instagram and my own Substack (even though your post about how to grow without social media was super helpful). I’ve read enough of your posts to know you left Instagram for a reason, but I can’t find your story. Have you ever shared it? If not, why did you leave? Do you regret it? Would you advise against me using instagram?”

I’ve spent the past week thinking, praying, and journaling to gather the words to respond to you, Angel. So here it goes:

I got on Instagram in 2018. I was a quirky, naive 23-year-old. I’d just graduated from Georgia State University in Atlanta, Georgia, which should be dubbed America’s official city of scammers. That “fake it till you make it,” & “use anyone to get ahead” environment made me feel behind in life. It seems silly now, but I was in serious mental agony over the fact that at the “big age” of 23, I hadn’t started a business or made six figures.

I had just started my first year as a kindergarten teacher, too. And with big money came new freedoms (big money = $33,000 take home salary, LOL). I had 3 roommates, and spent every extra dime I had saving for vacations to escape my life and the students, who were quite literally abusing me.²

So, in October of that year, I went on a trip to Puerto Rico with my best friend, who happened to be a part-time influencer, and suggested I get on Instagram, too. She said that sharing my travels could earn me “free stuff,” and when that didn’t persuade me, she said, “You can sell your book idea!”

I wasn’t a fan of social media even back then, but she hit my soft spot. At the time, I wanted to write a book for teens who were also survivors of molestation. So, like any sane person would do, I Googled “how many people need to buy your book to become a New York Times bestseller.” “20,000 people,” Google spat back, and I genuinely believed that all I needed to do was get 20,000 followers and all of them would buy my book. That was all the convincing I needed; I downloaded Instagram and created an account.³

It took almost two years to get to 20,000 followers, but by that time, writing a book was long gone from my mind. I’d got swept up in the digital world. I’d started a travel agency called Thrifty Travel Tribune, sold Instagram profile templates to business owners, and Lightroom presets to photographers and influencers. The latter became my “big business” and soon my passive income was 4x greater than my teaching salary. By 25 years old, I had quit my job and cleared my retirement pension. My businesses grew so much, so fast, that even The Shade Room posted about me and said good things. I was shocked.⁴

As time went on, my business evolved. I started teaching entrepreneurs how to get visibility for their business, how to engage a social media audience, and how to stop being scared to show up on camera. Before I knew it, people were calling me their business coach, and for a few years, I was coined “The Digital Sales Guru.” An identity was given to me, and I now felt a responsibility to be knowledgeable about what I was teaching. I got certified in business coaching at Northwestern University and marketing strategy at Harvard.

This all sounds great on paper, I know. But it was tumultuous for me. Looking back, I spent much of my twenties being told who I should be, and helping people without pausing to help myself, too.

One year, I earned $800,000, and spent $300,000 running my business, the rest was given away to followers… I paid rent for single mothers who DM’ed me saying they were struggling. I was paying for therapy sessions for peers, and college tuition for one of my assistants who lost her funding. I sent laptops, and microphones, and cameras, and whatever else to clients who needed tools to succeed. I don’t regret any of this, I love giving! I just wish I’d loved myself enough to set boundaries… to see when someone was actually in need vs when they were taking advantage of me.

This morning, my pastor (Dale Bronner at Word of Faith) said this:

“Givers have to set limits, because takers have none.”

Most times were good, but there were a lot of bad times, too… and very mean people online. At my peak, my social media manager said I received up to 300 DMs a day. She had to hire two assistants of her own to help me keep up with messages, and many of them were straight-up nasty. Folks told me that my joy and faith were fake or annoying or too much. People said they hoped I’d die. I had weird men say they’d find me and rape me. By this point, I had encouraged my sister to get on social media, and a man had stalked her and found her job offline, which horrified me.

The sad thing about cruelty is that it blinds you to all of the beauty in the world. I know that I’ve probably received tens of thousands of lovely messages in my years on Instagram, but the dark ones are the ones that made me question myself, crawl into a corner, and contemplate leaving this world.

I’ve never shared this, but about two months before leaving Instagram, I had started seeing a new therapist specifically to work through “Instagram trauma.” I was trying to convince myself to stay on the platform. Insane, right? I remember thinking, maybe after our fifth session or so, that all this just wasn’t worth it.

“This” = the hustling, exhaustion, and constant cycles of burnout followed by shame or comparison followed by trying to learn to love myself. I realized I could just leave. And so I did. Not that day, but a month later, while on a writing retreat. I had just had such a sweet encounter with a librarian at a bookshop in Bath, England, and as I went on Instagram to share it, I thought, “I don’t want anything to spoil this moment.” So I didn’t post, and I haven’t posted since.

So, Angel, that’s the story. I know it was probably still much longer than you anticipated, but I hope it allows you to see what I’ve come to realize: that everything just moved too fast. I didn’t take have a moment to slow down and say, “No, the algorithm doesn’t get to define who I am,” or “no, I don’t have to keep doing something just because I’m good at it,” and “Yes, I will pursue my dreams of writing!” For a long time I thought my desire to leave Instagram was built on a hatred for the platform, but it wasn’t.⁵

I was using Instagram to grow a brand that was misaligned for so long. I lost my voice. I lost myself. And there were things I needed to heal from and work through.

Since leaving Instagram, I’ve just been learning myself… slowly and deeply. I wrote, pitched, and sold another book, and that advance has allowed me to finally take time to explore my curiosities. I’ve picked up chess and continued learning Spanish. I got a poodle puppy and I sold a financial literacy curriculum that allows me to teach kids without being in the classroom. I’m writing a romance novel and learning my author voice along the way. I’m finally living the life I’ve prayed years for — a life of quiet success, soft ambition, and radical authenticity. And most importantly, I’m finally the woman God called me to be.

So, the truth? Yeah..

There are things I’ve missed about Instagram. At first, I missed the quick validation of likes and shares and easy visibility; but that was before I started learning that I don’t need validation or permission to create.

Lately, I’ve missed the speaking engagement offers and brand deals. Recently, a luxury boutique hotel offered me space to host a free creative retreat for my community. The rooms cost $2k a night, and they were willing to give me ten rooms for free… until they realized I would be promoting on Substack instead of Instagram. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t immediately spiral and second-guess my decision to get off the platform.

But even with all of that, I can’t say I regret leaving. I’ve needed this time to grow, heal, and reconnect with who I’m called to be. I’m still working through the comparison and people-pleasing habits that weren’t caused by Instagram, but were certainly exacerbated by it.

But, being on Substack has shown me that all social media is the same. Regardless of how we like to say Substack isn’t social media, it is. And just like other platforms, it’s demanding and fast and algorithmic. But, instead of leaving this time, I’m deciding to work through it, create my own lane, and continue to share my voice.

So no, I won’t discourage you from using Instagram or any other social media platform, because even I hope to return to a video-based platform soon. I desire to land brand partnerships that can be opportunities for my community —like the creative retreat that would have been so awesome for us!

My only advice is to stay true to yourself. Hold on to your why. Create freely and honestly, and never lose sight of your vision. If you do that, you’ll do wonderfully.

With love and virtual hugs, Isis

1. One of my favorite words since watching The Heights by Lin-Manuel Miranda lol

2. I got punches in the eye and stabbed in the leg my FIRST day on the job!

3. Fun fact: I decided on the username “@isisbreanna” because I met my man the same weekend I got on social media. I knew he was my future husband, so i used my middle name instead of my last name, because I didn’t want people getting used to a last name that would change. lol

4. we all know how much the shaderoom HATES positivity lol

5. Though I do still find A LOT of fault in Instagram and social media, in general.