Create Your World, Or Die In Someone Else's

Saying Yes to moving to Manhattan, committing to my creativity in a big way, and building my dream life!

This post is a reminder that you don’t need permission to pursue the life you feel called to — and why we decided to stop waiting and finally go for ours.

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It’s been a rough week in the Bradford household. We’re still grieving the fact that our last round of IVF didn’t work, and that our sweet baby boy will not be joining us in the way we had dreamed. But in the midst of this grief, we’ve started to realize how much we’ve put our other dreams on hold.

My husband and I are different in many ways! He’s the methodical finance guy, I’m the whimsy creative. And so, we don’t have a billion co-shared dreams, but moving to NYC has been on the top of our list for years.

We currently live in Texas, and had decided to move to Georgia, to be closer to family that could “help raise the baby.” And while we can’t deny that having that kind of support would be incredible, we were sad to be giving up our hope to live, work, and create in The Big Apple.

As much as I love parts of Texas, living here drains me creatively. The pace, the culture, the energy… it just doesn’t make my heart flutter like when I’m in Manhattan… so, we’re leaving!

A few years ago, I read the book Put Your A** Where Your Heart Wants to Be, and one sentence has stuck with me ever since: “Your life is your canvas; stop painting by someone else’s rules.”

I have this idea that we’re all living two lives simultaneously: the internal and the external life.

The internal life is our compass: the things we truly value, the dreams we can’t stop thinking about, the passions that make us feel alive.

The external life is everything else: our jobs, our friends, our hobbies, our routines. Ideally, the internal life should guide the external, but often we let the external dictate the internal. We chase comfort, safety, or obligation, and our deepest desires sit quietly on the sidelines.

We see it all the time with people saying things like:

“I can’t pursue my dream because I’m stuck in this job. I’ll have to wait until things change.”

“I should be saving instead of investing in my creativity.”

“I can’t create my music because my kids need me.”

When we let the external control our internal, we wait for permission from circumstances that may never come. You might never feel like you have enough time, money, education, and whatever else to make your dreams come true; and that’s exactly why you have to go for them now!

I believe this is what French-American author Anaïs Nin mean when she wrote, “had I not created my whole world, I would certainly have died in other people’s.”

If we don’t take responsibility for building our own world — our dreams, our creative life, our true calling — we risk living by other people’s rules, expectations, timelines, and definitions of success.

So, how do you know if you’re dying in someone else’s world?

It looks like…

• Settling for a job that pays the bills but drains your soul.

• Postponing your creative ideas because “life isn’t convenient right now.”

• Measuring your worth by someone else’s standards instead of your own.

But when you strengthen your internal life, align it with your passions, and make deliberate choices about your external life, you start to truly live! You create the conditions where your dreams can flourish, you give yourself the chance to say yes to your calling, and start finding yourself saying:

“I’m going to carve out time for my writing, even if it means saying no to extra projects at work.” (The extra projects they’re not even paying extra for!!!)

“I’ll take small steps toward my goal every month, even if I can’t do everything at once.”

“I’ll find a way. Even if that means moving out of my comfort zone and into a space that fuels my creativity.”

I want to be the latter person; I want to be someone who says yes to my dreams, fully and without holding back. So I will! Because as simple as it sounds, saying YES to our callings is a choice! We don’t need permission from the world to chase our God-given dreams, even when they’re scary, inconvenient, or uncertain.

I don’t know yet if moving to New York will help my writing career. Heck, I might end up being a maid in Manhattan!¹ But I do know this: I want to live a life where I can say I gave everything a chance. For us, this move isn’t about guaranteeing success; it’s about cultivating an environment where our dreams get a real shot! To fully invest in our creativity, our passions, and our potential. And that, my friends, is enough to finally stop waiting. To finally say yes to our callings!

So, what’s the thing you’ve been putting off for years because it seems inconvenient, risky, or uncertain? What would happen if you gave yourself permission to go for it?

Up next:

Tune in Thursday, November 20th for a guide on How To Build a Brand or Business Without Social Media (for paid subscribers only)

1. Pleaseeee tell me you get this movie reference. haha!